14 January 2007

Just call me Maxi Pad

Ok, so as pet owners we're forever giving our pets ridiculous nicknames right? The list is long at my house: Hoov (short for Hoover), Pupsy Girl, Fat Boy, Tatter Poos, King Chicken-Chicken, Buddy Tat are all just a few of the names our pets get called. I recently heard a story of two brothers who renamed their family dog frequently, quite ingenious if you ask me.

I really started to think on this after visiting my crazy friend last night. She and her husband have a beautiful, large, 4 month old, male, chocolate lab named Max. Somehow this dog's nickname has become Maxi Pad. Which is beyond the utmost entertainment to we humans. But, do you ever wonder what it might be like to be this big, macho dog hanging at the park with all the other big, macho dogs, not to mention the hot little poodle and all her girlfriends, when suddenly your mom, or worse yet, dad yells, "Come on Maxi Pad, it's time to go home!!" (Ok, the best part of this scenario is being able to imagine my crazy friend saying this in her best "puppy wuppy" voice) What's a dog to do? Will he endure the snickers from the other guys, will the ladies instantly turn their noses and no longer find him cool and handsome? Will he get picked on the next time he goes to the park and not be allowed to join in any of their games? Neuticles or not, this could be potentially damaging to a dog's reputation.

So I ponder on to the fact that Maxi Pad has a sister, a gorgeous, long-haired tortie named Lucy. My crazy friend sometimes calls Lucy her pretty little pussy and from what I understand her husband is not fond of it. So explain to me why this man does not like for the female cat to be called Pussy but has no issues with his male dog being called Maxi Pad!? Seems like the perfect pair to me!

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"O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet."
St. Augustine

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The Night Villa
by Carol Goodman